I wanted a place to share this story that was a little more intimate than ye olde book of faces, but still public. And, I wanted to share it while it was still somewhat fresh. This all happened less than 12 hours ago.
My views on death have never really meshed with most peoples' so I don't expect anyone to agree with me, or feel all warm and fuzzy after reading this, or even really understand where I'm coming from. I do not fear death. I fear pain, and suffering, and the pain and suffering of my loved ones, but death itself does not frighten me. If anything, I am intrigued by it. It happens to everyone, timely or not, and on its own terms. I can honestly say that true sadness for the death of someone has only gripped me once, because it seemed so untimely and unfair, and it was someone that never got to say their farewells.
I do not know the circumstances of this man's life or death, only that he is now deceased, and that my friends and I were witness to the discovery of his empty body.
When you're drinking, and chatting, and playing beer pong with 3 of your favorite people in an apartment on a very late Friday night, you don't expect to hear knocking on the door of a neighbor's apartment, especially when you haven't heard a peep from any of the neighbors all night. So, when I DID hear knocking, it piqued my curiosity and I peeped my little eye through the peep-hole. Two police officers were knocking on the door diagonally across from the apartment we were in. INTRIGUE! SUSPENSE! WHAT FUN!
"The COPS are knocking on the door over there" I whispered loudly while motioning towards the appropriate apartment.
"Really? I think he's deaf."
J., who lived in the apartment, went to the door to look for himself. Yep definitely cops, and definitely knocking on the deaf neighbor's apartment. He opened the door and popped his head out to let them know he was fairly sure the man was deaf. The cops were grateful for the tidbit, and asked if J. had seen the man lately or knew anything else about him. Not really in the last week, but his schedule was weird, etc. etc. and then we learned that the man had been missing from work, and when they couldn't get a hold of him they found it mysterious enough to call the police.
After J. closed the door we had a slightly more difficult time focusing on our silly game, although, I believe that was the one that boyfriend and I won. For a moment it seemed the police and given up, but we quickly realized their car was still in the lot. Were they waiting for a warrant? Maybe, but they were also waiting for the landlord to come and unlock the door. When we heard knocking again we had to check, and the officers were back with the landlord in tow. When I peeped the scene they had opened the door about a foot and were looking in with their flashlights.
The feeling, and smell, of the situation changed immensely. When J. popped the door open to try and get a better peek, things were clearly not looking up. The smell was potent and bizarre, but not as disgusting as I would have expected, and the tense air had given way to acceptance of the inevitable.
When the officers reappeared in the shared hallway, J. asked if the man was gone, the officer replied with a, "well, I'm no doctor, but yeah," and he mentioned that there didn't seem to be any foul play. Once the coroner arrived and pronounced him dead, all our moods changed in different ways. J. seemed weirded out by the dead body across the hall, B. seemed to get sad and called her mom, who works in a hospital and sees death every day, and boyfriend seemed very nonchalant about the whole thing. I, on the other hand, wanted to know who this man was, what had happened. Was it accidental? Natural? Intentional? How did death sweep in and take him from his reality? Did he have family? Or children? All I know about him is that he is now dead, he had probably been deaf, lived alone, and, according to J., looked to be in his early 50s.
We drank a beer and clinked bottles to the neighbor. I don't know what time the police left, or when the body was removed, but boyfriend and I left at about 3am, with the squad car still sitting outside. Despite all the weirdness, we had a really good night with really good friends. We have amazing families and lots of people who care about us. Without any knowledge of his personal life, I can say that the neighbor was at least lucky enough to have someone in his life who noticed and was concerned when he wasn't reachable. Somehow, I think that's all we really want, is someone to notice when we're not around. Whether that man knew it or not, someone cared enough to take notice. Cheers to that.
Rest in peace, mysterious neighbor.
<3
